Bottles and Muscles

(Lyrics: EN June 2026)

In Dublin fair city
where girls are so pretty
a lovely young lady

became fitness fan.

A new training centre
one day she did enter
to maximize muscles
and look mighty grand.

Although she was eager
results were first meager
and stiffness in muscles
the clearest outcome.
Her response was a firm stand:
She demanded a pro's hand,
crying 'Massage my muscles!
Work hard on my bum!'

But already the next day
she lifted the wrong way
and pain in her bum
was like never before.
When her boyfriend just mocked her
she saw a young doctor
crying 'Mend my rear muscles,
please heal fiber sores!'

While trained as physician
the lad - no magician -
hoped for the best
with a shot cortisone.
For most careless aiming
he later got blaming:
The needle missed muscles
and struck her end bone.

The bone - badly fractured -
infection soon captured,
and the lady's ambitions
dissolved after that.
For drink she was suited
and soon substituted
beer bottles for muscles
and filled flesh with fat.

Moral of the story
is that beauty and glory
come very hard
and quite easily go.

So treat yourself nicely
and train gently, wisely.
If you want to max muscles
then let it be slow.
Alive, alive oho,
alive, alive oho.
Go gently with muscles,
alive, alive O.